CRY BABY, DON'T CRY

gue bener bener kebingungan apa yang sebenernya kejadian, pas gue chat sm rengga, rengga mau blg sesuatu gitu ttg gue ada yg ngeganjel, tapi.... dia malah off ga ngebales semua sapaan gue, pas kita chat pun dia udah dingiiiin banget, gue bener deh stress nya sekejap nostalgia ato flashback yang bener bener cepet itu muncul lagi di otak gue, gue ngetik asal asalan otak gue berat banget rasanya. abis itu gue milih buat offline msn, hm pdhl sih lagi asik chat nyaaaa. tp ya gue mau gmn ya. dan gue nyoba tidur----- tapi gue nggakbisa, nggak bisa sama sekali! gue nggak tenang buat tidur keadaan kayak gitu, gue berdoa dan abis itu gatau kenapa gue nangis, dan tdr nya jg balik kanan balik kiri........................ sampai suatu kali GUA LANGSUNG KEBANGUN GITU AJA, gue belum ngasih selamat malem ke rengga, gue bangun dan langsung cari hp siapa yang masih ada pulsa, wktu itu jam setengah 11 gue cari cari trnyt ada nokia, gatau deh nokia sapa di meja rias nyokap gue, dan ternyata battery nya abis, gue langsung buru buru cari charger di kmr bokap gue yang gelap banget, gue sendiri sambil nahan nangis

akhirnya gue dpt charger hp itu, pas gue charge trnyt hp itu batt nya masih ada, TAPI SIMCARDNYA NGGAK ADA! nangiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis gue! gela, akhirnya gue coba untuk tidur lagi, setelah GUSRAK GUSRUK gue capek dan akhirnya bisa tidur, hhhhh lega rasanya tp belum juga, tb2 ada sms kayak gini JANEET SAYANG, gue gatau itu syp! sial gue ga ada pulsa nihhh, gue pengen itu ren...... AH GA MUNGKIN! gue langsung tidur lagi, nah pas jam berapaaaa gitu gue udh nyenyek tiba2 hp gue bunyi lagi, lagu Barney nya bunyi lagi, gatau nya yang nelfon rengga,

sebenernya gue gatau ya itu mimpi ato enggak yang pasti gue denger suara rengga biarpun gue setengah sadar, kalo soa; mimpi mahh biasa, rengga bisa berturut2 3 hari masuk mimpi gue, huuu sakit sih, tp GUE KANGEN BANGEEEEEEEEEEEET

kalo kalian baca beberapa blg gue yg lain kalian mungkin akan nangis, karena gue juga gt men, sakitnya ngeresep haah kayak kecap ya. yaya ini biar kalian tau deh ya rengga berpengaruh banyak buat gue

just cry as loud

gue kemaren malem otp sama maya, hmmm sedih gue cerita cerita sama dia!!! huhu idup gue sama dia sama ngejengkelin nya -___- ya biasalah lovelife yang ga ngedukung ck. dan gue bingung banget deh ya kan gue cerita ttg gue sm rengga cerita nya kan gue nostalgia hhh gue tiba tiba langsung diem nyeeet nangis!!! tp gue tahan itu gara2 ada gue ga sendiri di luar. ck cuma netes sihhh tp pol loh nyesek nya sakitnya nggak nahan banget :'(

talk about it, don't mix it

ada yang bilang usaha ga bakal complete kalo ga di gabung sm egoisme ato ambisiusme ya kalopun pgn dapetin apa yang lo mau dengan 2 hal yg gue blg diatas, tapi itu semua nggak WORTH IT! gue ulangin itu nggak WORTH IT. itu malah memperburuk keadaan yg sebenerbya pgn lo perbaikin sedih aabis deh gue ngomongnya. ujungnya lo malah nyesel. Hhhh tarik nafas deh gue -.- Masalahnya gue juga egois sih maluuuuu. kalo lo ada masalah ya apapun itu lebih baik lo bicarain deh, jangan malah lo paksain buat cepet selesai

hhhhhh gue udah rasain ga enak nya ck. mending jangan kayak gue dehhh huah

mine

keegoisan itu ketololan yang paling bego sedunia hindarin deh tuh yang kayak gitu
bakal nyesel lo!

funny just for me

1. gue suruh si faqi kan ya tuh, gue suruh itungin putus enggak putus enggak nya gue sm rengga lewat upil nya, ihhh sumpah gue ilfl banget ya! bener bener dia tuh ngupil di ubek ubek idungnya wakwak shit banget. terus upilnya ditaro ditangannya gitu smbil ngitung zzz

2. kan gue sama rengga marsha andika ardi bingung ya nggak ada tujuan gitu ya..... nah abis itu rengga nanya mau kemana? tp nggak ada yang tau. akhirnya rengga kasih pilihan untuk ke warung steak ato papa's kitchen, nah rengga kan ngancem gitu ya kalo ga ada yang jawab waktu itungan ke 3 dia bakal tabrakin mobilnya ke.... trotoar kalo ga salah. dan gue percaya banget waktu itu, pas di itung 1..... 2..... 3...... tanpa pikir panjang gue jawab "warung kitchen aja!" guess what 1 mobil ketawa apalagi andika padahal gue aja ga ngerti itu lucunya apa hahahahaha

3. gue sm marsha kan lg main bareng tuh di rumah nya gitu ya, nah di kamarnya itu kasurnya tingkat, gue kan mau bangun ya dr tpt tidurnya yang bwh, yaah biasalah kasmaran haha gue sm mrsha tuh lg nunggu rengga andika ardi yg lg ada urusan gitu, gue tuh baru mau bangun dan blg gini "mar, gue kangen deh sama reng...." belum selesai gue blg apa JEDUUUUUUK! hentakan besar deh tuh. kepala gue kejeduuuut! marsha sih bisa aja ketawa sementara gue SAKIIIIIIT BANGET, itu tuh bunyinya udah kayak gendang udah gitu kasur atasnya sampe keangkat, alhasil sampe di jemput rengga pun gue msh tetep pegang2 kepala gue ini zz

4.nahhh terus kemaren, kondisi gue skrg kan lg jelek nihhh kaki gue bengkak gara gara keseleo gitu yaa jatoh kesandung lobang yang ada di trotoar, maluuu deh ya gue banyak om om sm abang abang di situ, kalian harus tau............. sama kayak kasus di atas, gue tuh lg mikirin rengga gimana di medan........... ck, kangen sama km bawa keberuntungan ya sygggg hahah



5. ahhh gile gue bosen banget deh ya ngepost nya jadi beginian dehhh wakwak, ya whatever deeeh ini mah asal lo teu aje

get it all back

i am totally bored, ou meeeen. i am chatting with azka and tiwi, they are both my lovely girlssss. if i can go out to somewhere else, especially Medan, where he is. Thank God aaaaaa.
Gile nih gue udah get it all back belumya? pas kemaren sih berakhir dengan hasil yang yaaa rada enak lah, tp bakal berlanjut nggak tuh ya.

Dear God, Dear Jesus, here i am to worship You, God! I wanna thank all things you gave to me adn sorry if all things i've done are just braking Your heart. Bless me with Your Power. And i want to ask You, God! please don't break me up with Rengga ya. I know You know i love him too little too much. I understand You have Your own plan, but listen to this one please............... love you! Amend. this night i wanna sleep, guard me with Your angels and guard him there too :D:D

somehow

hari ini Rengga pergi ke Medan..... for 2 weeks ya. hhh, padahal tadinya gue mau ajak jalan pas liburan wakwak, takdir berkata lain ya. Mau bilang apa, ya gue nunggu deh sampe orangnya pulang. gue juga nggak tau gimana dan kenapa, gue kangen sama Rengga to the max loh! Jauh dan lebih dari pada biasa nya, ck. Coba aja ya Rengga tau.

somehow i can't open my eyes easily without you

somehow i can't speak words i wanna say

somehow i can't move any muscle

somehow i can't think about anything clearly

somehow i can't breathe like usual

somehow i can't feel comfort

somehow i can't do anything i wanna do

when i finally find out

the reason is you

you're not here to wake me up

you're not here to teach me

you're not here to help me walk through life

you're not here to clear my brain

you're not here to be my air

you're not here to hold me

you're not here to be with me

Cepet pulang dong ya, aku tunggu abis itu kita jalan yaaa kayak kata sms kamu sayang. Love you you you Rengga

the reason is you

why i do need air

i wanna be alive

why i do need water

i wanna erase my thirst

why i do need friends

i wanna brighten up my days

why i do need pain reliever

i don't wanna feel pain of course

why i do need phone

i wanna keep in touch with you

why i do need hands

i wanna hold ya tight

why i do need lips

i wanna kiss your rosy lips

why i do need feet

i wanna meet you at our future

why i do need brain

i wanna construct our days

the dreams are now showing up

until they done the show

nightmare or not

it is just an unreal unwanted things

the days are now falling down apart

they burst to pieces i can't find where

the memories i saved are lost

i can't cry and i am speechless

this is what i became

this is what i destined to

this is what i was afraid of

this is what i was talking about

this is what i didn't figure out

about being unwanted

the truth about something

i didn't know

is now becomes reality

beyond the horizon

i was thingking to accuse

you were lying

something i was looking for

now i understand

i was looking for myself

i say i love you

not like what you heard

as i loved you

i confess i am no good for you

but i'm no aim to hurt you

i just can't believe you're not the same

this broken hearted

isn't a thing which is risking you

just a thing which is killing me

it hurts!

like you lost someone you love

like you lost something you like

like you don't understand any little thing in this world

like they are confusing you with facts you don't know where they came

this world seems so hard to walk through

Thank God! i was born here

if was not, i don't think that we'll meet

and i don't think i will find someone like you

even if when pain attacks

i am proud to answer that

the reason is you

the one i will gladly sacrifice myself for

the one i will gladly die for

i will make this clear honey,

you are my everything

it doesn't matter about those annoying things

just you and me

if one day i have to give in, even if i won't...... and i have to answer one question like this
"Janet, why don't you give up? you're just holding on with nothing"
The reason is you!

If you're not here, i don't wanna live, Chris Brown said "No air" Avril said "When you're gone, th pieces of my heart are missing you" Rihanna said "It cut me like a knife, when you walked out of my life" Elliot Yamin said "What will it takes to make you come back?" Barney said "I love you"

untitled

when love spreads their colors

i see your eyes

when love speaks to me

i hear your voice

when moon shines bright

i remember your shiny glasses

when i smell the flower

i smell your scent

but tonight, everything is different

your messages are not delivering again

your phonecalls are not here to fill my empty night

your goodnight, i love you is never heard again

your sealed with a kiss thing is not for me again

but do you know

i think i'm already trapped

i'm stuck with you

i can't get you out of my mind

i remember when you were whispering

to this ears

i remember things you don't even wanna know

they say love is just a game

but for me

love is about how to take care of the one you love most

hey boy, if you hear me calling

would you turn your back

then you call me back like this

"hey baby, sorry i don't mean to leave"

this pressure is taking me undercontrol

i can't even feel my own heart

funny isn't it

i'm shivering i'm crying i feel numb

love you tooo much

---

i'm bored.

doom doom damn

today feels like hell
i can't lie how it hurts
it burns my veins
those doom came
the other doom comes
the chaos went away but when i thought it was happily over'
the other chaos starts the war

where are my friends
oooo i get them there by my life
where is my boyfriend
i am shy, i really don't know

i just can't see us apart
i just can't get it over
i just can't forget it
i just can't erase it

all things you've done
hurt me perfectly at the heart
3068 points hit
you get it all okay
you change my days into storm
you change my dreams into nightmare
you change my life into tragic story
you ruin my happily ever after
but I REALLY LOVE YOU
THAT'S WHY I'M HOLDING ON
it hurtssss dear, it hurts
i've never felt this pain before
it's not that easy to give in
this pain is different
i can't deny i love you

and i miss you

i miss you
those three words i promise
will never end

i don't know how are you
what are you doing
where are you
and with who

when i look through your eyes
to see how beautiful is your eyes
you captured me
i'm paralyzed

i can't move my tongue to speak out any word i can. it hurts, and like the river.... my tears flow down, my tears fall down. i have no reason. but it's just feeling happy and feeling numb. i am drying my favorite shirt which is wetted by those bloody tears. it is so unfaithful. for me, it is so unfair. it's not easy to take my sight away from your face which usually i stared. not a million fight could make these feeling broken, i;ll just wait and see until you get back and bring me the pain reliever. so i can walk through it all. i really miss you to death. more than any people could possibly admit. the sunshine is just a cool breeze for me. i need you to warm up this soul.... when i was tied up at my fear, you set me free with your magical words, your magical words sounds so nice in my ears, it was echoing in my head. and when i was broken, you said you will mend this broken life. but the way you reflect it just by destroying again this untidy days. but i can't hide, i just miss you tooooo much. i miss your lies, your beautiful lies. i miss your naughty kisses and of course the scent of your body when we are hugging, i miss your voice a lot dear

love, j

no end

i don't know who am i now? i mean, what i mean to other people! it seems like my life belongs to be broken. every time i get what i want, just a while just with one wink act, it is all taken back again!!! ouuuuh men this pain has no end.

"nih ya gue kan tadi denger gitu nyet katanya gue udah putus sumpah otak gue serasa meledaaaak saking sakitnya sampe mati rasa nih gue. malu gue kalo di tny lovelife ny gmn blahblablah! pas gue tny kata dia enggak, tp di kacangin lagi!!! yang namanya sayang itu ga bakal sanggup ngacangin terus maksut dia apaaan? alah cuma mau milikin aja knp harus di iket kayak gini sih? gile yaaa tragis banget nih idup gue terus terusan. hooo udah ngalah teteeep aja di pojokin. slh apa gue sama lo......."

this day is so boring, there's nothing special! um, since there's no more love beat ya....... "i'm here alone, didn't wanna leave" ciyeh gue dengerin si chris brown nihhh. ck i'm not the only one to be hurt deh ya come on baby. i want you to be mineeeeee :'(

i think that today will be a new day, haa honestly, it's everyday, i feed myself with lies "it will be okay janet, he will come back, it will be okey just fine yaya so on" then i try to run from the truth from reality, what i get? just unbareable pain! just a little part of a different taste of pain. uhhhh i'm tired. i wish i could leave you alone!!! alone alone alone and i wish i could live without you. but all i feel is just i miss you so muccccch. karma karma? yaaa whatever. i really want you back rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

best buddy bear {HONESTLY}

hey buddy! do you remember me? ck, i miss you a lot meeen! you're my best buddy bear ever :p
we are frieeeeeeeeeends! all the way all the time, then let me help you to think straight

it hurts to see you go from our side. from your bestfriends from your classmates and me! i love my remember-whens. now you seems so far from us. you choose not to be with us, your playmates. you choose not to laugh with us together anymore. i know you're now in the happiness scope, but don't forget us....

remembering long ago, ou men that hurts!
our remember whens:
-- i went to your house with M and playing with J, my goshhh! i miss it
--i fought with A and friends, then the ones who were by my side were you and yer friends, i was the only girl there
--we were palying futsal with them for many times
--we were playing basketball and futsal at our school in saturday and then went to McD
--we went to pim and play together at your birthday
--we played at M's house then i pushed you to A's bed then we played tickle-each-other! i remember you can't stop laughing when i tickled your tummy hihi
--we met at tendencies, then we chose a shirt and we ate es campur with C
(come on neeeeet!///i can't it's hard to remember it all)
--when i fought with H, you were by my side, and you want to take it all away!
--when we went to (........) it was fun buddy really!
--when you went to my house
--when we were talking about porn with our friends
--when we were going to..........
--when we were playing fight fight fight and kick kick hit!!!!
--when we hug each other to warm our soul...........
--then every single day i spend with all of you! you and them........

that's what friends are for!!!

but now, when i just sat by your side, it wasn't the same. that day she judged me. she hates me! just because we're so close. i love you i miss you WE love you WE miss you in the scope of friendship
and we hope you're not changing too much and not leaving us forgetting us and ya whatever
we miss the old-time you!!! we don't wanna lose you

i'm sick of this

wow! you know what Rengga sent me a message says 'Janeet'
HA-HA funny Jane! i'm still chatting with Eja and there she is, Deea is back from taking a bath

Okay let me tell you something about my life, my life isn't that nice. Like hers, like his, like theirs, like yours. maybe it's just simple. take one step then try to make another then make another than make another until you aren't seen in this town. i mean you are far like heaven............ after that you try the forgetting part. this is so easy to talk that way. BUT when you try to, BOOOOOM! you will not even turn back. all you want is to come back. same like me, i can't do that move on part. just remeber if life seems hard it means you're not going with the flow. i'm sick of this story, movin on then playback time again and again. it is hurt, sure! i'm not okaaaaaay, i am not i am not an d i am not and i will not! until this revenge painted. ouh i'm burning!!!! i'm tired to be named as a bitch as a non-self-priced girl as a brainless girl! i am tired! hear me saying this! I HATE YOU, this is the last time and the first time too. got it!

My long messy bang

here's my fucking face. hey hey take a look at my bang friend. isn't it long? i really want to cut this such of bang, but when? i planned it for a long time ago. ouuuh mom! mom! mom! take me to saloon please. i already sick of this bang. cut itttttttttt maaa. since i told you it has a bad effect to my eyes, you said 'yes yes yes' but when. i want prove mom! aaaaaa such a bad kid. i love my hair honestly. i regret i cut my long hair many months ago. huhu then i realize that hair is something awesome especially when you take care of it! now, i'm growing my hair long. ck, hopeless indeed, i thought why don't i take a short cut? maybe...... hair extensions? hahaha so barbie! but i choose not to extend my hair with those deadbody's hair. uuu scary right! just wait, when my hair grows longer, i'll show it to all of you.

Happy Birthday Iqbal!

IQBAAAAAL! happy birthday ya friend. wish you all the best friend. and i hope you will finally get your dream girl haha. thanks for helping me a lot ya. i apologize for any mistake i might make in the future bal! i hope you'll be one of the long-aged people :D:D God Bless!!!

<3 ,you?

someday i will prove it to you. i am strong enough to enjoy this pain you gave
what will it takes to make you come back?
is it wrong to force you?
the days i spent
the life i walked through
are now going empty

the boy i think i know
is now changing
the young man i usually stared at
is now going away

no need to cry
i'm not that shy
no need to share
this pain i can't bare

enough on hurting
you turned on lying
enough on fighting
i turn on giving in

if i were to talk
i will say
i--love--you
it i knew the reason

i will be sorry
i will be guilty
don't turn your back
don't add your steps

look in my eyes if you dare
learn about me more
sure! you will understand
i try that hard to hold on

Confession of a broken heart

when you need something

when you want to do something

when you like something

when you love someone

when you are left behind

when you get hurt

when you can't reach what you want

when you are behated

when someone call you bitch

when you are scared

when you are crying

when you are alone

when you failed

when you lost someone

broken heart can't mend their self

but if love fills it

no one could deny, it is fix!

so when will my broken heart fixed?

who knew?

Your Call

"Waiting for your call i'm sick, call i'm angry call i'm desprate for your voice. listening to the song we used to sing in the car. do you remember butterfly early summer. it's playing on repeat..........."

somehow i feel i'm not the one

but when you called me

it was warm

and i feel i am now loved

i can see lies through your eyes even when you talked your voice sounds like honesty. some say 'eyes cant lie'!!! hey fellas, you know what? last minutes, he called me. just to ask 'where are you? you've been to school?'. do you know i really miss him like hell. this fire is burning my patience down!!! i don't want to be weak anymore. no matter what i feel soon, i will FIGHT! friends, i am fasting now!!!! hhh i'm hungry, grrrrrrr this gunger is a monster. it wants to eat youuuuu. especially ehem the one you know who. i'm dreaming of a glass of Ben & Jerry's Baskin Robbins then Dairy Queen and vanilla milkshake. what the fun. now i'm chatting and replying comments...............................

i planned to hang out with FAQI but what a shit, he has to go to pim at 03.00 o'clock. and guess what, i've been to school this day. i'm in charge to explain the profile of my school. at school, i was on the phone with Faqi, i was okay until he said "kayaknya putus" oh my gosh i really know nothing about my relationship with those young man anymore, then suddenly he told that?!? SHOCKING SODA! then i learn to hope a new thing. i just can't move, i just can't go R

doing while thinking

i'm bored and i'm chatting with Deea and Reyza, plus Jessica. i'm waiting for his goodnight sms. but will he send me one? like it or not! it's uncertain. i'm thinking about where is he about? blablabla

i'm thinking ooof
no need to cry (my pm)
no need to say good bye (deea's pm)
no need to hesitate

even if we have to move on. even if we have to be hurt. just do it!!!

PS I miss you

all i want to tell
all i want to say

I miss you

if i mean something special to you, i really hope that you don't mind to hold me tight :')
if there is one reason between you-and-me, you don't feel the way we felt
for sure, i'm no aim to hurt you. i just love you too much. i'm too proud. but lies you made up are now showing up. i can't say one thing just to confess what i did. i'm shocked of what you have done.

you promised not to leave me alone. you wanted to mend this broken heart. what a lie! you made me believe. and what a stupid girl you are Janet! like i told you, i won't hurt you, i won't leave you and i won't break you down! i complete my mission. i miss you like mad, i'm sorry i can't lie about this. i need to learn how can you do this to me? i feel guilty about forcing you to stay. i'm fuckin hell spelled!!! i can't get you out of my mind.

waiting for something uncertain

hey i'm waiting for your message
.........your call, ck wanted!

something bother my vision
i dreamt that you were missing
when i woke up
i finally realize that i was lost
from long time ago

i'll be there for you

this promises are not made up

i'll wait for you

this time is running to catch you

you said love
you say hate
you said hello dear
you say bye biatj

that night i slept in your car
i laid my head at your shoulder
you whispered i love you
but now it's just echoing as a memory

the things you have said to me
is now ruined
there's no certainty
i wait here by my side

a little smile curved in my face
just to cool down those fire in my head
maybe i am loved
or maybe i am not

give your answer
just through a whiper
and give me a walk to remember
i hope we can be forever..........................

smile like that

smile like that, the way you smile makes me smile
as you smile, i already knew
you're just covering your lies up
but i really can't deny your sparkling eyes

the night we're together
is now the pain i couldn't bare
so you need to play fair
because there's no need to share

your smile is the most wanted
most wanted things
i've ever needed to see
i love you and i mean it

with this words
do you know how much i miss you?
this memories are getting older
i want to turn back time if i can
love, janet

about being unwanted:'(

the place where we usually together
is getting colder
the topic that we talked about
is fading now
i don't know why
i dont't know how

i just learn to take it all back
when i came home last night
my phone was ringing
but i chose not to pick it up
i guessed it was not you
and i know t'was true
seems like you ever care about me

all of your messages
are getting deeper inside my heart
your voice
is echoing inside my ear
i think about our remember-whens
and i know it won't come back
then, my shoulder you lay on
is know just a memorable organ of my body
it just left a little smile for you
miss, janet

My fourth post of this day -_-

i really don't know what to write.
confused like this @_@ hhh, i'm chatting with my big sweetie cousin named Jessica. ouh men, why Rengga isn't onlineeeeeeeeeee? Does he existttt? ah i hate it a lot!!! what is going on here now?SOMEBODY TELL MEEEEE! why i can't erase all those lovely moments? am i too in love or what. i want to learn how to get on this condition fellas.........

HELP!!!!

Friends are everything

Friends are everything!!! that statement is exactly, totally true. 100 points hit! Okay because i'm already sick of this boredom. i'll tell you who are my friends my only ones

My Sunshines, i get Marsha! she is an arabian-faced and fun. she's like my twins. and i need her a lot :'( then, i get Raisha Nur Amalia, she's my girlfriend.... just kidding haha crispy isn't it? she's so kewl and so thumbs-up! i also get Maya! she has the same feeling as me, being hurted and trashed, all the sameeee. she's my old friend too. i get Irma! she's beautiful-- well, actually My Sunshines are all beatiful, amazingly their faces are painted by angels :'). she's nice too and she is strong minded hehe

I love you guys

My Rainbows, i have Tia cvc in here, Tia is so loved hihi. She's smart and kind that's the reason i love to call her my friend, also Vera. i have....... Deea! she has the same lifestory like me, broken and forgotten. ou men! keep on moving ya dee, i loveyou. Kak Sheila-> she is my wonderwoman :p hihi even if i never met her before she act so sweet. My pretend brothers, my "special" pretend brothers are Faqi and Gordy, they're friends of rengga. they are both so kind, they help me to face any problems i get during this hard times.

Thankiss ya

My PLASTICS- Cvc, Berdina my sayang, who has the same hurtful life, Tiwi my beautiful tall model, Mozza my bule arab, Wiza my gaul cabe rawit, Wine my basketball sweety, Diba my cheerleading baby, Syela my cutest pig hahah and Taqia my sexy-ou-men

Lovesssss

My Five Stars Rated, #15 11 PT, Reja Aster Cella Dimas Enrico, Kak- Ranny Gita Sasmi Adinda Cleo ASHA ANIMATA (my sayang sayang) Thaya Julie Diba and Kak- Yo Dirga Aryo Arya Azka Dira Anitha PEDRO-CEEL Bernando and all of my Wiwtm

day of the damn!

iouuuuu like i told you i'm totally bored.....................
i'm waiting for any message which enter my phone's signal hahaha. i hope it is from him (nope)
i check my phone and guess what my bunny misscalled me.............. Aster Vinnie si cantik. i guessed that it was iqbal who said 'call you later net'. totally wrong! nowadays i've been facing my days w-i-t-h-o-u-t rengga. i don't even know wher he is. yaya what can i do? just wait. remembering june 30th. it must be painful ya? hhh so it's better to forget it, just this days. justin said what goes around comes around. when will my turn comes?

Just help me, i'm mentally broken

i'd like to thank my friends, all of them are fuckin crazy. what i learn is how to let go. rengga please come back and hold my hands okay? we could be together.hhhh just enough day-dreamer! ck, ou men today Aster goes to Penabur, different from me. i'm stuck here all alone with no friends, just my silly little naughty sister, Josi

xoxo, Janet

Well, this is life

i am totally bored and sad this time i ever feel real. today i feel like i was opening a new life because hm...... something that i adore is really really disappear. i think that i can't go on, i can't move on. it's too hard, i don't want to lose those memories. when life seems hard it means you're not going with the flow. but it's true that sometimes we have to fight with the flow. well actually and honestly, sometimes i imagine what is the reason that this life is so hard to face?

Life is wonderful in their own way

Every single memories are not made up

You can learn more by moving on

that sentence sounds OUCH! hm, okay i'll tell ya a short story of mine. this day i really miss my boyfriend who's not missing me at all. but from there i learn to be strong and to build a well-built gun to fight. sometimes i feel i am unwanted and i don't suppose to be born at all. but i think, hey! i have family and friends who are always there, who stands beside me, who walks with me and hold my hands when no one else did.

but the most hardest part is when you have to give in what you save, to destroy what you build, to decrease what you increase ant to forget what you get. it hurts. so when you asked me what hurts the most, i'll answer......... to leave what you love and to hate what you like, oya one more to trash all the things you have ever wanted. well..... that's life! no one could explain why, but no one could ever deny too. unfortunately, life is a monster, i mean life is two-sided. when life is so sweet, their bitterness will grow. and when life is so bitter, their sweetness will sprinkled. it's called balance. like my life, i never wanted to be forgotten. i don't want to be just an additional sweeter. but can i deny? no, it's just the line. the line where you start to compete.

like Irma's Friendster background

Everything will be okay in the end

If it's not okay

It's not the end

i'm egoistic, that's why i'm not giving you in R!......................

sorry that things just BOOM! in my mind

i have a boyfriend, but now it seems hurt to feel him again. okay, i'm shy, i'm shy to be called as a bitch, two-faced and ya you know a girl who doesn't has self-priced? it hurts, but i get it all away, i face it just for be with him together again. yesterday, precisely 2months ago, everything was so wonderful. it was filled with happiness. no days without laughter. really! everyday, that holiday, i spent with my boyfriend. because i was back together at that time. everything kinda chaos when we reach our 3weeks. oh my gosh! i can't believe it. all of those memories, just turned into tears. but i try to be strong. i believe i can face those through. i can face those hard days. as time passed, everything was all changed. smile and laughter turns into tears. our messages just flew away. all i have just now is a little smile which could rise my memories about that time.

reng i really miss you and i'll be there for you :') to be honest you really make me disappointed but all i know is just i really love you. and i hope you didn't really change.

in this topic i just want to say that i miss him a lot. and i want it all back, our memories and our laughter. wishing all those things back just bring an empty hope, sometimes miracles will come and washed away this chaos. don't forget that life is a miracle which is given by God and nothing could ever pay it back :")

ngegaul di bintawroh pelaza

niat nya sihh mau foto studio pertama.................... ehh gatau nya ga jadi nyiet. aahhhh padahal yeee kan gue udah bawa money tuh.



perjalanan pertama di mulai ke rumah marsha, kan abis les gitu gue kalling marsha yaaa. akhirnya gue ke rumahnya gitchu, dan gue nunggu raisha juga. abis udah nyatu semua, kita nganter marsha ke tpt les piano nya gt, dan gatau nya les nya blm mulai, hhh gue dgn terpaksa jln balik lagi ke rumah nya dia kan bareng2. dan begitu sampe di sana ga lama setelah itu, adek nya mrsh selesai les piano, it means marsha harus pergi les, gue bertiga balik lagi ke tpt lesnya marsha, begitu sampe di sana ter nya ta ma sih se teng ah jam la gi!!!!!!! oh myyyyyyyy, perut gue udah sakit banget deh, puasa men puasa. dan akhirnya kita mutusin untuk ke bintaro plaza dulu kan yaaaaaa. dari sana begitu jam 2, baliiiiiik lagi ke tpt les marsha. you know what kita jalan kakiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. gile deh begitu masuk tpt les marsha yang full AC itu gue langsung nyesssssssss duduk deh gue.





dan abis marsha kita anterin, gue sama raisha balik lagi ke bintaro plaza shorten as bp jalan kakiiii. soalnya kan gue mau ketemu kakak manis kakak bebifessss si faqi............ dan rengga gitu. sementara si raisha mau ketemu iqul. dan begitu faqi and the gang dateng iqul juga udah ada, so i talk talk dikit lah sama faqi, and dia pergi kan balik katanya mau ke pim. ehh tp ujungnya balik lagi si rengga sama komplotannya (faqi iqbal tyo sama juan), ajak gua nonton, tau ga sih sama anak anak nontonnya asoy geboy, wawawawawawawawa gue ilfil deh ngeliatnya ga sange sama sekali



begitu selesai nonton kan gue sm marsha netep, yang lain mau ke pim alhasil yayay pas rengga mau turun dr eskalator ya eyke sun kan yaaa, sumpah deh i forget banget mau pnjm hape buat nelfon nyokap dimana ahahah teriak deh gue panggil si faqi yang belum jauh, begitu udah kan pada ke pim tuh yang boys. gue sm marsha nyusul deh ke nyokap gue, mau minuuuuuuuuuuuuum haha, sebelumnya gue ke Quickly dulu, gatahan banget nyet udah maghrib wkwkwk. nah abis ke nyokap gue foto box kan ya sama marsha................ you harus tau muka gue udah kea kuda gosong gitu hahah, dan berakhir dengan marsha yang balik, dan gue yang talk talk sama mama, tante, om dan adek sepupu. yaaaa at least today gue udah ketemu rengga setelah sekian lama (uhuhuhuhuh) sumpah gua kangen parah tp ga bisa lampiasin ya deh gue diem aja jadinya ou men nyesel ga sih

boredom and sadness be one

FREAK MODE- ON!

gelaa deh nic gue lagi nunggu jam 2 mau ke penabur, this is my third post in this day, ya i feel bored meeeen. totally stress and i feel a big mental breakdown overwhelms-_- gatau mau nulis ape, jadi maaf deh ya kalo ga jelas. abstract i mean. aaaaaaaaaaaaa faqi nihh ah tuh kan gitu sama adeee ya. ets bentar deh eeeeee ada sms yeah eh dari bhea donggg, teyus dari faqi juga.......... sama dari itu tuh orang yang eyke sayang the most, do you know? ayo tebak deh.................................................................................

okeoke ancur deh nih gue cuma asal ngetik ajaaaaa.

eh eh liat muka gue yang ini dehhh, sumpah kayak babi kan? hahaha tapi nliat doooooong tangan gueeeee bangga ga sihhhh (ih janyet) tunggu deh ya aku mau search foto lagi, foto yang aneeeeh deh nih gue coba pamerin (kalo adaaaaaaaaaa)

ahhhh tenyom deh gue malah liat pas chat sama rengga wkwwkk, udah deh ini aja yang di pameriiiiin. bentar ya gue coba cari lagiiii haah

nih nih muka gue lagi nangis, aib banget kan kayak nahan pup hahahah, dasar lebay dc ihhhh sumpah ngakak gue ingetnya nyeeeeeeeeeeeeeet

udah udah deh ga jelas nihhh. gue lagi abstrak gak jelas jadi wajar aja yaaa. akyu punya banyak banget masalah zzz. aduh sumpah nih hari capek gueeee. ououououuouo tarzaaaaan i'm janeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-t

eh eh sabtu pada jalan ga sihhhh gue pengen jalan nih kan cewritanya, tp gatau mau sama siapa? maunya sihh sama si itu wakakak aih tapi ga berani deh ah gue. eh eh tau ga looooooooooo semua masa gue lagi buka youtube gitu kan ya dari tadi gue dengerin lagunya ariiiii dicintai tuk disakiti, terswwerawh nya glenn sama ini nih lagi little wondernya rob thomas hzhz gelaaaa nih gue gatau kenapaaaa udah deh ah cepet dong temen temen gue contaaaact. i'm bored nich i need extra refreshing thingsss. ck, uouou

Pedro Pierre and Christopher Lambert

okay, those two people i wrote at the title are my best pals. they're in a brotherhood. gue ga sangka ya jadi gini z, ngebayangin mereka pindah ke bandung aja berat, aaaaaand t'was even worse, they moved to singapore.

ck, gue sediiiiih banget deh. apalagi waktu farewell mereka gue ga dateng. pada bilang disana mereka semua nangisss parah banget. aduh temen macem apa gue ini (maaf yaaa ped, eeeeel). ini semua gara-gara sekolah gue yang pulang jam 15.30. dan gue ga bisa datenggggg nganter mereka ke bandara, can you imagine thaaaaat? gue mikir at least i have to give them something before they gotta take their flight. sumpah dan gue ga bisa kasih sesuatu ke mereka, terakhir gue ketemu itu di LUSTRUM,pensi nya penabur. disana bener deh total act tuh sama pedro sampe lari lari ke luar sekolah. inget kan lo ped kenapa? gue cerita kayak gini nih, seriuuuuuuuuuuuuuus deh ped mau nangis nginget elo sama cl.


pas di lustrum cl jadi drummer dia manggung gitu, yaampun suer ya dia keren banget deh, oke banget mainnya saluttt gue jempol eel jempooool. pas sama pedro tuhh ya gua sampe lari lari keluar, barengan gitu. itu pas lagi berantem sama rengga gitu hahaah. aduh peeed malu banget ya gue sama lo. pedro itu orang nya baik banget. lucu, kocak dan juga bener bener deh supel, kalo Cl, dia tuh super setrong orang nya tp tetep aja kocak lucu gitu, terus suka ga jelas:D:D. makannya gue sedih banget mereka pindah. ga cuma gue yang sedihh, maya bebe roland terus jt karen marcella echel aster irma, aduh ga tahan deh keilangan tuh sosok dua. pas gua denger dia mau pndah ouuuuuuuuuuuuh damn gue langsung tersentak kaget parah, gatahan abstarak banget bingung mau kayak gimana. yaya gue sih ga bisa bilang banyak ya ped, tapi lo sama cl harus tau. kita sayang banget sama lo berdua. kalo bisa kita juga mau lo balik ke sini, gausah pergi ke sporeeeee.


pedro dan cl, kalian take care ya di spore, don't ever forget us and our memories yaaa ped,eeel. kia semua pasti bakal kangeeen sama looo berdua. cepet pulang ke indo okeeee?

ce eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel ini waktu kelas 1 nihh el

IRMA JETE BALIKAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

SUMPAH YAAAA GUE SENENG BANGET TERNYATA MEREKA BISA BALIKAN HARI INI JUGAAAAAAAAAA AAA LEGA DEHHH BISA NGEBANTUUUU

AWET AWET YA IRMA SAYAAAAANG, JAGA DIRI SAMA JETE:D

jeteeee pj gede nihh ya sama gua ahauahau

Deea mameeeen

nih gue baru ol msn ahoy deh gelaaaa, dari tadi gue ngepost blog mulu hahaah, ya whatever deh, yeh gue langsung sapa irmaaaaa loh jeeeeeeet.

gela ga lama lagi buka puasa,uhuuuuuuy gue buka puasaaaaaa dong yaaa asik bangga :D
nih mana sih iqbal katanya sore mau nelfon hiii gue kan mau cerita tau ga, gue cuma mainin keyboard laptop ajaaaa deh ah. nih nih lagi curhat sama si Deea wakaka, nih anak kocak gile deh yaa terus punya tujuan yang samaaa gitu iya gasihhhh de?


Deeah, Deeawxyz@hot says (17:36):
AH JANET KENAPA KAN GACERITA KAN
Deeah, Deeawxyz@hot says (17:36):
MALES DEH IH AH UH
J, 1nasib ya may, visit jntabigail.blogspot.com ya! says (17:37):
DEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA MAAFKAN DAKU
J, 1nasib ya may, visit jntabigail.blogspot.com ya! says (17:37):
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa rread my blog deeeh deeee

tuh tuh awal nya ahahah, gile ya men satu penderitaan banget gue sama deea, aih dilupain ya de kita (kita?elo aja kali net) traggis dehhhhh...................................... aaaa lama banget sih nih mau buka puasaaaa. nahh hari ini gue ga ada less yes yes yessssss seneng deh bebas, capek gue men, udah gitu puasa lagiiiii. huuuu rengga juga dimana sih ya kangen deh, (apasih net kayak gue kangen aja sm lo) aduh stop deh negative thingkingnya (eh emang bener kaliii eeeet somplak lo net) aduh jangan deh reng tegaaaaaa lo dimanaaaa (ya dimana kek asal ga ada lo)

YaTuhaaaaaaaaaaaan jangan sampe deh kayak gitu, gue harus bisaaaa puasaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa rengga kalo baca contact donnnngggg (gausah ngarep lo net, kayak kita balikan aja sih, sok) anjing dalem ya sampe kayak gitu oh no jangan gitu neeeet belum buka nihhhhh


Deeah, Deeawxyz@hot says (17:47):
PERASAAAN INI MASIH INGIN MEMILIKI
J, 1nasib ya may, visit jntabigail.blogspot.com ya! says (17:49):
pantaskah bila aku tak mampu melupakan mu?---harus kah ku sesali apa yang tlah terjadi................. marcell

nih ya pada tega deh sama gue plus deea, balik dong ah pake ojekk deh rumah gue sama deea kebuka kok, lo cukup bawa puisi minta maaaf ajaaaaa. ah cuma bisa minta maaf nih ya udah nangisin gue sama deea?

BALI TRIP 30jul-03sept

oke nih hari juga malu maluin banget, kulit muka gue ngupaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas aje gile deh kea orang allergyyyy.
dan ini semua gara2 gue ke bali nyong heheh padahal cuma tiga hari tapi tetep aja deh panasnya menyeringai di badan. kan gini ya tanggal 30 tuh gue berangkat ke bali, pas sampe di sana gue ke nusa dua bentar visit ke hotel lain gitu. nahh dari sana gue langsung aja deh ke kuta, gileee bau pantai banget kan tuh, gue ngebayangin ya pas sunset gue sama si itu di situ (hah susah cukuplah) gue sama adek adek gue main main di tepi pantai, haha kea orang udik gitu m\lari lari pas ada ombak zzzzzz. sementara nyokap gue cuma duduk aja dan bokap gue berlagak kea cameraman gitu sok ngedokumentasiin. hahah gue sihh ngakak aja ya please.itu hari pertama...........

dan hari kedua gue sama famileeeeey pergi ke tanah lot sukowati, ngelewatin ubud sama ke bedugul untuk ngeliat danau yang super duper bagus banget. setiap gue ke tempat tempat bagus itu selalu yang gue inget rengga, dengan yakin nya hati gue bilang suatu saat gue bisa ke situ sama rengga wahahah (Renggggg....................) gue disana cuma kerjanya foto foto terus yaya gitu gitu aja dehh ga asik mah pas itu, tapi pas di sukawati tuhh yang heboh. nyokap gue beli banyaaaaaaaak banget buah tangan ahaah---bahasa indo betttz. gue juga beli buat orang yang gue anggep penting di idup gue (cehhhhh...) hari itu di tutup dengan hm nontonin bule bule naik bali slingshot ahuahuah ganteng gelaaaa deh ada satu bule yang ahoy banget mukanya hehe tapi kalah lah dia dari rengga (yeeee dia mulu deh net)

dan hari ketiga gue daripagi sampe jam 1lebih gitu kalo ga salah, di pantaaaaaaaaaaaaaai mulu berenang aja kerjanya, diwarnai dengan adek gue yang ngambek gara gara ga boleh nyewa mini surfboard gituuuuu, ujung nya siih di kasih tp gue juga yang pake wakaka. gue main main ke tempat yang ombak nya gedeeee hih enak deh kaya gujluk gujluk ga jelas gitu ahahah gue senenggg banget main airrrrr laut sampe gue teguk satu kali, hoeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek "enaaaak " banget deh rasanya nano nano. nahhh dan bego nya ya gue lupa pake SUNBLOCK ,tolol ga sih gue? aaaaaaaaaaa kulit gue kebakar gosong dan sampe merah gitu udah gitu sakiiiiiit banget kalo di sentuhhh ah nyesel tau nggak. selama di bali gue sih rada sedih juga kayak kehilangan my jakarta friends gitu aplg yang ayang satu itu tuh, pas gue sms-an sama kakak-kakakan gue yang paling ganteng baik pinter rajin sopan rajin beribadah dan juga soleh----udah deh gor gausah sok fly gitu, ahaha dia kan kayak nanya nanya gitu gue gimana sama rengga dll, huuuu gue kangen tapi ya ga ada contact........... udah udah cerita nya stop net. hmmmm hari ini gue kan juga ke Garuda Wisnu Kencana, Dreamland yang dulu punya nya Tommy Suharto sama Pura gitu dehh yang banyak monyet nyaaaaa. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah gue liatnya rada takut serius deh tapi yaya bodo lah gue yang penting seneng haha---------------------------- malemnya gue cuma ke discovery mall sama liat toko toko baju yang ada di sekitar kuta. yayaya besoknya gue kembali ke jakarta tanpa contact sama si R...........................

happy ending?

For Irma and Jt

sumpah hari ini banyak banget kejadian yang ngebuat shock ya. dateng ke penabur gue liat ada yang seneng sama cewenya, tapi tiba tiba gue liat jete dari lantai atas ngelambaiin tangan ke gue, dan ngasih isyarat dia putus sama sahabat gue yang cantikkk namanya Irma...........

Gue ga bisa beneran percaya karena setau gue ya mereka tuh awet banget udah mau 7 bulan. gue tuh seneng banget kalo liat mereka pacaran pasti bawaannya seneng deh apalagi irma sama jete tuh org nya sama kocak. jadi kerasa klop gitu loCCCh, gue ngliat muka jt tuh sedih banget kusut banget ga kayak biasanya, begitu juga irma irma ga ceria lebayria gitu tuh. dan ternyata mereka emang putus, tapi mereka masih deket layaknya orang pacaran, mereka rangkulan dan sekejap ngebuat gue inget LAGIIIII sama Rengga. gue langsung inget sama wangi nya rengga, wangi mobilnya sama wangi rambutnya, widih langsung mau nangis dehh reng sumpah. apalagi gue tuh udah ga contact sama rengga, ngeliat irma sama jt tuh malah ngebuat sakitttt banget ih, seandainya irma baca gue pengen deh ma lo balikan sama jt, kalian klop banget dan masalah masalah kalian ngebuat gue salut banget tau ga sih, kuat banget sampe tahan sejauh ini. satu hal yang lo musti tau ya ma, pas lo pulang gue kan masih sama jete marsha thonce tuhh, jete cerita cerita tentang lo ma, dia seneng banget tadi pas pulang lo udah mau ngbrol sama dia. liat deh ma jete gak mau keilangan lo, kenapa sih ga lo coba SATU cara yang ampuh buat lo balikan bzzt yaya bukan maksutnya ngatur juga sihh biar irma tau aja yang jete rasain. gue tau lo berdua sama sama gakmau putus kan?? gara gara masalah yang "itu" doang? cih yang kuat dong sayang, pertahanin sama jete. semoga balikan yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. good luck

For Irma and Jt, yang sabar yaaaaa nih ma baca dehh ya gue rela nihh biar lo tau jete segitu sayang nya sama loooo :D:D

Maya Martha

I LOVE MAYA

first blog

oke oke ini blog pertama gue ahahaahh abis gue suka kebingungan kalo mau cerita kemana ya dehh oce lahirkan blog. halo semua dan salam kenal